Meet us here, Living, Loving God, in this time of worship, prayer, reflection, and celebration. May your resurrecting Spirit continue to move among us, bringing renewal, energy, inspiration, and joy to our collective journeys of faith. Amen.
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Today, we find ourselves at the very end of John’s gospel with the disciples back in Galilee trying to figure out what to do next. It’s been a whirlwind of a journey for them! So, before we jump into today’s story, let’s take a quick look back at John’s version of the Easter story.
It began with Mary Magdalene going to the tomb before dawn, finding the stone rolled away, and the tomb empty. She runs back to tell the others. Peter and the Beloved Disciple (who we assume is John) run to see for themselves. They find grave clothes, but no body, so they leave.
Mary is left there alone to weep, wondering where Jesus’ body could have been taken and by whom. First, two angels appear to her. And then she becomes the first person to encounter the Risen Christ. She doesn’t recognize him at first, but when he calls her by name, her eyes are opened. “Teacher!” she says. He can’t stay long, evidently, and departs. So, Mary goes back and tells the male disciples the wondrous news that she has seen the Lord.
The disciples are locked away in hiding. And maybe they spend all day wondering if Mary is right or delusional. But that night, Jesus appears to them. “Peace be with you,” he says. “As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” He breathes on them and says, “Receive the Holy Spirit” and commissions them to continue his work. It’s Easter and Pentecost all in one.
But Thomas missed the whole thing. The others fill him in, but he wants to see for himself. He waits a whole week but then gets his chance. Jesus appears again and shows him his hand and his side. “My Lord and my God!” Thomas proclaims.
And chapter twenty then concludes with these verses addressed to us, the reader: “Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples that are not written in this book. But these are written so that you may continue to believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have life in his name.” (John 20:30-31)
Sounds like a good way to end a gospel, doesn’t it? The gospel writer probably thought so too. Many scholars think this was likely the original ending of John and that today’s story was added on just a little bit later to serve as a sort of epilogue to the gospel, partly for the purpose of incorporating some of the key experiences and traditions of the early church. And one of those traditions is the importance of Peter’s leadership.
And so, as we consider Peter’s journey of discipleship and how it might inform our own, this final movement of his story has a lot to offer.
The disciples back at home in Galilee, back at the sea, back to fishing. And we might wonder are they just living in the past? What’s going on? Why aren’t they out there fulfilling their mission like Jesus told them to? Or, perhaps after all that transpired in Jerusalem they knew they needed to get out of there, but didn’t know where else to go or what else to do, so they returned to what is familiar to regroup. It’s understandable.
But the fishing is not good. And this has symbolic meaning. John’s gospel uses light and dark as a metaphor a lot. And we find that here too. All night, in the dark, they try to fish on their own, but they catch nothing. Something is missing!
But at sunrise, Jesus (the Light of the World) shows up on the beach, tells them to give it another go, and they catch so many fish that they have to drag them to the shore because they can’t haul them onboard.
The message is that Jesus embodies and delivers God’s abundance – abundant love, grace, possibility, and hope. This is the last of many illustrations of this abundance that appear throughout John’s gospel: Jesus turns water into wine, calls himself the Living Water for those who thirst and the Bread of Life for those who hunger, he miraculously feeds the five thousand (with leftovers!), and so on.
And then, they sit down for a shared meal, a celebratory feast of this abundance. This post-Easter beach barbeque breakfast is sort of a bookend to the Last Supper. Jesus is the host once again, offering in loving service to his friends a meaningful experience of communion. It’s a meal and a ritual of remembrance and celebration by which they will be nourished and strengthened to live out their calling.
I suppose we could add fish to our communion menu each month! That’s probably not a great idea. :) But what we should hold onto from this story is that every time we gather together at the table, the Risen Christ meets us there as host and friend, offering abundant love, abundant grace, abundant encouragement, strength, hope, healing, compassion, comfort, presence… the things we need to sustain us, the things we need to live out our calling. Communion is not only a remembrance of the past; it is a feast of God’s love here and now.
After they eat, Jesus turns to Peter and addresses him directly. Three times Jesus asks Peter, “do you love me?” Three times Peter responds, “yes, Lord, you know I love you.” Three times, Jesus continues, “Feed my lambs.” “Tend my sheep.” “Feed my sheep.”
Biblical scholar Jaime Clark-Soles asks us to notice that Peter’s triple denial of Jesus took place around a charcoal fire, as Peter was warming his hands on the night of Jesus’ arrest. And now his triple redemption takes place in a similar fashion, again around a charcoal fire. His story has come full circle.
Peter is being made ready to embrace a new phase of his journey. He was a disciple, but he must now become an apostle and a leader. He was a sheep, now he needs to be a shepherd. The other disciples will to. They must tend and lead the flock. They must feed the sheep.
And it won’t be easy. Peter too will face persecution and crucifixion (according to the tradition of the early church). Others will also. But nevertheless, they must follow in the Way of Jesus. In this moment they are commissioned and sent forth once again, just as they were on Easter night when they were given the Holy Spirit. “Follow me,” Jesus says.
I’ve often wondered if Peter felt inadequate. Did he think his denial disqualified him from discipleship and leadership? The gospel makes it clear that there is divine grace in abundance to forgive him, redeem him, and restore him. But did he struggle to find the grace to forgive himself? How did he let go of his past failure and embrace his new future?
Do we have that kind of grace for ourselves when we fail or when we feel inadequate? Do we trust that there is divine grace in abundance for us to help us regroup, reset, and start again? There is! But sometimes, like Peter, we need a reminder.
And, you know, here’s the thing about finding grace for ourselves: it might actually make us less afraid of failure, more courageous and willing to take risks that are worth taking for the good of ourselves and our neighbors, and more honest and clear-eyed in our own self-reflection when we need to regroup and restart. And the purpose is not to get stuck in guilt and shame. The purpose is to learn, to grow, and to do better in the future.
Maybe grace, courage, and honesty work together for our common good. It seems that was true for John Newton who wrote the hymn Amazing Grace – easily the most popular song ever written about this subject! Maybe you know his story. He had been the captain of a slave ship and an investor in the slave trade, but had a profound change of heart, saw the errors of his past, and ultimately renounced slavery and became an abolitionist. Historians are quick to note that it was a process that didn’t happen overnight. And I suspect he had to confront his own guilt and shame, find grace for himself, and find trust in God’s grace for him in order to make a change and find his path of redemption.
In addition to self-reflection on our personal histories and experiences, I think it is important these days for us to engage in honest, clear-eyed explorations of our collective history (the good, the bad, and the ugly) as both Christians and as Americans. Personally, I feel called to help counter fear and denial of honest historical-critical reflection.
Systems of power like to protect themselves from critique. That is something we have seen throughout human history and we’re experiencing it now. We’ve seen it in the history of our religion. And we’ve seen it in the history of our country. But we can’t be so afraid of losing societal and cultural power and privilege that we are willing to deny or cover up that there has ever been anything bad or ugly, any missteps, in our collective history and that there have been lasting generational effects from some of our mistakes (like slavery, for example).
Again, the purpose of taking an honest look at the world we have inherited is not to get stuck in guilt and shame. The purpose is to learn, to be moved by compassion, to grow, and to work toward a better future together. And there is grace enough to help us do that.
When Jesus asked Peter, “do you love me?” his response to Peter’s affirmation wasn’t “good, you better.” Jesus’ response was “feed my sheep.”
It was a forward-looking response. Peter wasn’t to be bogged down by his past. He was called to live into his future, to follow in the footsteps of his teacher. And we are too.
And so, as we move through our lives and into our collective future, the Gospel of John leaves us with a few important reminders about how we might just encounter the Risen Christ in new ways as we journey onward:
First, when you feel like you’re not getting much return on your labor, keep fishing. Don’t believe the myth of scarcity. There is abundant grace, hope, compassion, justice, and love to be found; keep casting that net.
Second, when you feel like you’re traversing uncharted territory, remember that Jesus, the disciples, and others have traveled similar journeys before you. “Follow me,” said Jesus. We’re not left to find the way all by ourselves. Jesus showed us the path of love and still meets us along the way.
Third, remember the resurrection. Live the good news of resurrection. We may fear death. We may fear dead-ends, failures, and falls, but none of those have the last word. The God of life and love is still making all things new, still graciously opening up new paths before us.
Fourth, come to the love feast Jesus has set before you. Eat your fill and be nourished, restored, and re-energized. Trust that the feast of grace is abundant and there is a place for you in this church community, in this wondrous world of God’s creation. You are a part of the family.
And finally, while you’re at it, make it a potluck. Bring some nourishment for others. If we want to love Jesus, if we want to see Jesus alive in our midst, we’re called to feed the flock. And there are so many ways to do that. Embrace your way with joy. Where service, compassion, care, and love are found, there is Jesus. Time and time again I have found this to be true. And I bet you have too.
So, wherever your journey of discipleship leads you this day, and into the future, may God’s grace and the Spirit of the Risen Christ meet you, fill you, energize you, and empower you. Amen.